Regardless of your age, being honest with your loved ones about your sexual identity can create crisis. Your family may not understand, or think you’re going through a phase, or their religious beliefs may be rocked to the core.
Many parents wonder what they did wrong. Give them a break and let it soak in. You may be surprised to know that your parents have suspected something different all along and by telling them you are simply making it known.
BE PREPARED FOR LOVED ONES TO ASK THESE QUESTIONS:
- Are you sure?
- Are you rebelling or experimenting?
- Will I have grandchildren?
- What will our church think?
- Did I fail?
- Can this be fixed through counseling?
- How will I tell my friends and family?
- Why are you doing this to our family?
Regardless of your age, it is important to be prepared for this line of questioning. Do not take offense or be defensive if your parents/loved ones need to be alone for awhile. But make a time with them to finish the conversation.
If your child of any age is struggling to come out with a sexual identity other than heterosexual, you may already have suspicions based on years of observance. Putting off the conversation doesn’t make it go away–it causes them more distress, isolation, and fear.
They may turn to drugs, alcohol, or suicidal thoughts/actions due to their belief they would never be accepted or for fear of abandonment. Perhaps you shouldn’t wait for them to come to you, but offer a loving and kind conversation instead. You may be the person that saves your child’s life.